Insecurity is like a predator. It hides out of sight and stealthily creeps up to you to attack in a flash, leaving your body in a state of insecure high tension. Its deadly claws represents the ‘insecurity’ that is omnipotent, hanging around to absorb its prey. It removes the secure ground under your feet and makes you believe that anything, from any direction could go wrong at any moment... 

The predator plays like a minor refrain throughout the story told by the third officer from the Ukraine. That which is stacked up at his door is more than most would have to handle in a lifetime. Every detour he tries to escape ends up in impossible insecurity.  

If he were to take a flight home from here, in Durban, he would have to take up arms like others. When someone shoves a Kalashnikov in your hand without uttering a word, the caption is very clear: Use this to kill! It is not meant for ‘cops and robbers’ games. It is to eradicate. 

His family escaped into Europe. It is not sure where their home is now.

As always, when the cards are stacked against you, some of his fellow crew members are from Russia. The relationship between them is still good, but the situation is impossibly difficult. Rationally they have nothing to do with events unfolding in the Ukraine, but emotionally you want to name a scape goat. 

Chris can only listen - that is why he visits the ship. As often, the silent listening is incredibly valuable. When talking about possible solutions, the seaman utters a sombre conclusion, ‘Only death’ - his desperate conclusion about what it would take to stop Putin. 

Finally, after listening patiently, Chris could only whisper, with empathy and assurance, that he would continue to pray. He can also explain about the Man on the Cross - a Man full of empathy and care. It is this Man that stops at the lame man, the man that all others pass by. It is this Man that heals the daughter of Jairus.  Yes, it is an impossible situation, but your and my God is the God of the impossible.   

Financial donations help the CSO to remind men working at sea every day of the one Surety in the midst of the insecure. As a result of this work some discover a Helper and Saviour, while others experience love and hope. Please think about supporting us with a donation. You can do so in prayer and deed. God uses the CSO daily to serve the men and women working at sea, by sharing the Gospel. For this we also need your assistance. 

All that remains of the school desks where he sat only a short time ago, is ash. Really ash. The place where he ate ice-cream with his family on special days, lies in ruins. Really in ruins. His house is a pile of building rubble. 

Think about it for a moment. It is the destruction, it is the burnt out earth where everything you knew, everything that you call home, everything had been reduced to a displaced picture of suffering. It is surrealistic to sit on board a ship in the Port Elizabeth Harbour and see pictures of the city that you quite recently called home on TV. The pictures have been rearranged into an incoherent tragic disarray of images... 

Mariopol has been destroyed.  

The pictures flashing on the screen show people fleeing silently. As they walk to somewhere, they do not say much. Every person carries what he or she can. Some carry a bag, others a bundle of clothes, others nothing. The man Danie talks to confirms all. He does it quietly. His school, their favourite ice-cream place, his home - everything is gone.  

His wife and children fled and are safe, he shares gratefully. He has nothing to return to, so he will stay on the ship longer to start fresh. That which he had worked for over many years, had been destroyed. 

Danie listens with care. His task is to help this man to remain standing in this situation. It is so easy to be reduced to nothing too when the world around you tumbles and crumbles into nothing. That is why Danie spends time, as much as is necessary, without being in a hurry and without checking his watch every now and then. As they finally pray together, plead together, ask together, the moment is flooded by emotions, but also a touch of hope - hope that there will be a way out. This man will carry the hope with him over the next days, until they reach another harbour where someone can encourage and support him again.  

Your donation makes it possible for us to give our time to the men working at sea each day. Please never underestimate the value of this. It is a huge gift that you give with open hands. We thank you for that. It is gratitude from our hearts.

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We frequently believe that God cannot use us. There is something that makes us not good enough for God. Too sinful, too short, too thin, too long - anything we keep out of God's eye. We will probably very rarely think of ourselves as a witness of faith.

Esther was an orphan. She was also a Jew. Actually, everything counted against her in life. No parents, no social status, poor. She was a "nothing". There was no way she would get anywhere in life. At that time of the history, that was how it worked.

Esther's story is one of suffering, betrayal, conflict, desperation, disaster, miraculous salvation and most importantly - the hand of God in the story. Mordecai states that Esther becomes the queen, purely for God's purpose. She is ultimately the one who saves the people. In Esther 7: 3 she speaks on behalf of the people to ensure that the people are saved. See how God worked with the story: this unimportant girl who had everything against her -  God uses her in His providence to make the difference. God foresaw that the possible extermination of the people would end in  a victory.

And you? Do you also think you are not good enough for God and His work? That you yourself are not a witness of faith or can never be? Take another look at the story of Esther. She was not worthy to serve the Lord, but the Lord used her. She did make a big difference as queen. You are also a witness of faith for CSO.  Your part in the work of the CSO makes you a witness of faith, a FAITH HERO! Then no matter how big or small your share is, it is God who works with it.

We know you are a regular donor. Thank you for that. But if you are not a monthly faith hero, please consider it! It will help us immensely.

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Reducing a life to a mere pawn on a chess board - that is what war does. It wipes out lives as if they are without value, nothing, unimportant. In the melancholy exploding bombs, the damage seems irredeemable. It negates what had been achieved in a lifetime. 

A captain from the Ukraine stands before Loffie. He spent his life with passion to be promoted from rank to rank, to achieve the highest rank - Captain of the ship. He did this to build a home for his family and give them life. 

Now all had been reduced to pain, rubble and ash. The last news about his family had been received via friends. A cryptic message states that they are fine. They are trapped in a bomb shelter with other family members. They are hiding from the Russian bombardment that rains down on the city without discrimination and it does not matter whether you are good or bad, young or old, guilty or not guilty, against or for the war... At the time of the message they had been trapped for eighteen days in the shelter. 

Since then, no news.

No messages. Nothing to say we are alive, or a message to convey the most feared news... 

Simply nothing.

Communication with the Ukraine is almost impossible. A part of the Russian strategy was to eliminate all cell phone towers and all forms of communication. That they did... 

That is why the captain standing before Loffie is in a state, a state of absolute desolation. He has a million questions, but there are no answers. The fear that accompanies this, transcends all. When the news shows the brutality of bodies that are strewn in the streets like rubbish, you automatically look for something you may recognise - perhaps a shoe sticking out from underneath a sheet of plastic, covered in an attempt to disguise the cruelty of war. Perhaps there is a pair of blue boots that used to be the subject of teasing, or perhaps it is the new pair of trainers your son so desperately wanted and that you bought before you left home the last time. If you hear nothing about your family, if you have no information, each piece of plastic may hide the gruesome death that someone tried to cover up. There is every possibility that the sheets may cover someone you love. 

Please think about the immense weight of this situation. 

We appreciate your donation, support! Loffie Schoeman, Richards Bay

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We appreciate your donation, support!

Loffie Schoeman
Richards Bay